1. You have a BMW or Lexis -  I'm not trying to be a car racist, but every BMW and Lexis driver I have encountered on the road has cut me off and tailgated, even when I was already speeding. They seem to think that if they have the respective logos on their cars that they are somehow entitled to do these things.
   
2. Baby on board signs on non-mini vans -  It seems that the people who put these signs on their cars expect all other drivers to be extra cautious around them, so they feel they can do stupid things while they are driving, like cutting across 3 lanes of traffic at the last minute to get to their exit.
3. Your chin is in front of your steering wheel when you drive - Either you are going blind, or think that somehow seeing the very front of your car at all times is going to make you a better driver. But either way, unless you are a little person it isn't helping.
4. You have your turning light blinking for more than a minute after you turn or change lanes - I can accept about a minute of this, but after that it tells me that you are just plain not paying attention.
5. You are holding a cell phone while driving - I assure you that telling Suzy that you liked her pink skirt and matching shoes today is not worth your life, or mine for that matter. The show "MythBusters" has proved that driving while you are on a phone (and I believe they even proved it with hands free kits) severely affects your ability to drive safely. Call Suzy when you get home. If you really need to tell her something, pull over.
   
6. Your skin has more wrinkles on it than my shirt - Sorry. I don't want to be mean by saying this, but the fact of the matter is that a good amount of elderly drives drive drastically below the speed limit. This has the potential of causing all sorts of accidents, especially from the drivers I listed above as they try to get out of the lane they are in. If you aren't comfortable driving within 10 mph of the speed limit then its time to stop driving.
7. You find the need to apply your mascara while you are driving - This is basically the same thought as the cellphone. Concentrate on driving. Take 5 minutes when you get to your destination to get pretty. Save me days in the hospital or my parents the grief of burying me because you wanted to look cute. Just FYI, in most cases, I find women who don't wear makeup or wear very little incredibly beautiful.
8. Your car has a hemi - Those engines have a good amount of kick in them. I have a friend who used to drive one and I drove with him once. Never again (at least not with him). A good amount of people who drive those cars are tailgating me within seconds of entering my lane, then instead of giving me the opportunity to move to another lane (which I am more than happy to do, feing the cautious guy I am) they take my opportunity away and then cut me off a second later.
9. Your sunglasses have lenses that are bigger than your palm - Girls (and I do mean "girls" in this case) I assure you that these sunglasses are hideous. I don't know many people who wear those because of their functionality (and if this is you, this doesn't apply to you). I don't know if its because the girls who wear these for fashion are spoiled rich girls who's daddies will buy them a new porche if they wreck the one they have now, but these girls seem to have awful driving etiquette. They don't follow basic right-of-way rules, don't use turning signals and in general are bad drivers.
   

I by no way am saying I am a great driver. I didn't get my license until 2004 and I am 27 years old (you do the math). I am also sure that some people fall into the above 9 sections but are great drivers. But when I see someone that falls into any of these categories, I am usually extra cautious, because in general, they are not.

Sometimes you want to do something. Something to tell someone something without actually saying the words. You sit and you plan and you imagine how it will work out. Then right when you have the perfect plan, you stop yourself.

"It occurred to me that my speech or my silence, indeed any action of mine would be a mere futility." - Joseph Conrad

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